• Ayesha Patel

Returning Home

There is something about busyness and the energy of a crowd trying to get somewhere that subjects me to the most surreal steadiness and introspection. Externally, there is an energy of relocation around me, but internally, my body moves to bring me back to myself; to return home.

I feel my inner child, I see my younger self. Being back in a city which has seen my wounds, which has nurtured my healing- a city that has never failed to provide me with spaces to unearth my dualities- invigorates this necessity to keep this truth alive. Every time I shut my eyes here, I inevitably go to places which demand to be healed. I am confronted with the anxieties, the communication blocks; I am faced with the aspects I am now ready to let go of.

Sitting amongst this crowd ironically helps me feel less alone. It calls me back to myself through this act of appreciation and gratitude for where I am at right now. I am granted with the opportunity to honor my place in the current moment while also recognizing what it is that I yearn to feel in the present space; what feels good to feel.

That is when I always come back to the feeling of joy.

Opening my heart to what matters most. That which illuminates joy, that which galvanizes love, that which hums the vibratory web of community, and that which viscerally steers me into the direction of kindness. Because the reality is, do those things which do not stem from love and serve love truly matter?

Love is Her. Being in service to Her is learning to listen to Her voice which steers me within, which supports me externally. Ultimately, I am here for the world, here for Her, here for the people I have met, and all the people I have yet to meet. I am here to forever be in tune with myself. To forever be love.

For nothing matters more,

because when I am of love,

I am in love with the world,

I am acting in service to Her,

and since She is Love,

Love is what will always emerge.


Being back home in this terrain which has presented me with some of my most challenging moments in how I build a foundation for receiving, defining, and embodying love has also introduced me to many of my first and most fervent states of love. Love for people, love for myself, and my love for my passions- all that which keep me aligned with this inner joy, ambition, hope, and connection.

Returning home has reminded me of the noise I get to choose to listen to. Returning home has offered me the chance to regain control over how I choose to go about exploring stillness. It has encouraged me to revisit the embrace of curiosity that our child-selves know how to hold for expansion and play.


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